Playground Uprising

And The Zombie Sleeps….zzzz
January 22, 2007, 5:55 pm
Filed under: Children


Did you hear that?

I suppose first I should contemplate why I am posing questions to a snoring zombie. Or is the snoring really just a cover? I have had my suspicions.

Well, I heard that and if you are a mom you likely heard it too. The cry, the grunt, the grimace, and the ever famous piercing scream that alerts our neighbors (unfortunately for them we share a wall) to contact Social Services immediately because surely a horrendous crime must be in progress, but somehow the zombie sleeps, a puzzling phenomenon indeed.

So what do we do as mothers? We get up. Not softly, gently peeling back the covers, but with an accidental kick to the the zombie’s ankles, a swell of the blanket to bring in the winter air, followed by the loud stumbling from the bedroom …. a silly production put on in an attempt to raise the dead. But the Zombie sleeps.

Then, as we enter the nursery, we turn on the Lullaby CD for the 39th time and carry on a conversation with a six week old who is more responsive than his fellow housemates. And though we are in the adjoining room and the monitor is on, projecting our conversation to every corner of the house ….. still … the zombie sleeps.

And then the feeding is done, the conversation is over, the ritual of stumbling, wind blowing, and ankle kicking reverses itself. But still the partner remains silent.

It is now 4:45am, granted not a normal waking hour for must zombies, and the alarm goes off, signaling time for the zombie to go to the gym, a valued endeavor. And, in a span of 10 minutes, the zombie punches the clock, washes his face, brushes his teeth, puts on his workout clothes, laces up his shoes, and is out the door.

Perhaps it would serve baby Charlie well to learn to beep.


4 Comments so far
Leave a comment

with posts like this how long before we give up the newspaper?!!

Comment by demon

You are the best… and it is SO TRUE.. what I love the best is when they say, WOW What a great sleep I got, the baby must not have stirred at all…..

Comment by Ginny

Yeah Dorothy! I can’t wait to read more!

Comment by stacey

This has everything to do with prioritization. The Zombie.

Comment by Anonymous

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